self awareness

[Sung]

just out of curiosity... what made you realize you might be gay/bi/curious.... etc..?

i'm 22 years old, just fresh out of university and only within the past year, after numerous relationships with girls, I've come to sort of entertain the possibility of a relationship with a guy. but i'm hesitant, scared, confused... you name it. I just don't know.

Would like to hear your experiences if you don't mind... :P

[Tedders]

Ive known since I was a child that I'm "different," but I didn't understand that I was "gay" until I began puberty...so maybe around 11 years old or so? Although to be fair I went through a period in High School where I thought I was bi (I was wrong).

But from what I've heard from my gay friends, I was an early-bloomer. =)

My advice to you is: take it easy. It might sound cliche to say it, but everyone goes at their own pace. It's silly to rush into things and slap a label on yourself (although I'm sure you'll feel lots of pressure to come out and label yourself as something or another).

You are definitely still young, and there's no reason why you can't experiment with guys and figure out if that's what you want.

Just chill out and play it safe....and of course, have FUN with it (I mean c'mon...guys are awesome. Enjoy it!)!

[Mike]

i also actually had the almost same problem, i just don't know what am i now? hmmm...

[Andy]

For me it was that I always wanted to touch/be close with people in general. And as a kid I always made my friends masterbate with me, ha ha :P didn't know really what I was doing... just thought it was funny.

Then when puberty came any everyone I knew was into porn. That's the thing, everybody is open to masterbating with other guys or just showing off, cus almost everyone wants to try it atleast once.

So yeah with your issue, maybe your just curious. I say give it a try, and see if you like it, and don't think too much about gay or not gay. Just try it out and see if you like it or not. Bout the whole fem thing, I don't like it either so if your not all girly... not all gays are. Which goes to show this whole sex thing is not about how you appear it's about how you feel.

[Makub]

well I think is a matter of what you want, I mean... do you want sex? do you want love? or do you feel attracted to guys in a way is not friendship?, wichever is the answer only you can make it right... when it comes to this there are no such things as a ''correct ansewer'', the one you such by your own free will is the correct.

I think you should just be what you want to be, and as long as you don't regret anything in your past you can live happy! ^-^, as someone said above, try it... sadly (for some) the only way know it for sure... is to try it.

[DaisukeNiwa]

Sexuality can be a confusing and take time to really come into fruition. Aside from social norms and circumstances, don't be afraid to explore your sexuality, just do it responsibly. I had a friend who thought he was gay, but when he was with a guy sexually, it reconfirmed that he had more heterosexual tendencies than homosexual ones.

Some people will try to simplify it with quick methods of figuring out your sexuality, but I caution against it because if you're really straight but going through sexual curiosity, then you shouldn't label yourself and let it take its natural and healthy course. The worse you can do is deny your sexual interest(s) and try to force yourself into a label.

[Osukaa]

Hmmm well I gues all you can do is learn from experience. Anything we say can never compare to lessons learned yourself . Take a chance and see how it goes. Lifes to short for "what ifs" . I know its hard especially if its your first time . You know if you need to talk im available kk . Well just do your best and I know you will come out of this with a better understanding of yourself . LoL besides you know people are just waiting for you ^^ . Just be safe and be carefull . Ok buddy ttyl. =P

[Knickolo]

I think I already knew I liked guys early. I was 11 when I learned that I like guys better than girls. Right now, I still like girls. But I like guys more.

[Alex P]

...When I looked at myself in the mirror.
Damn, I'm so fine.
Just kidding!

Labels are not there to validate but to sum up a whole. One girl had me trippin but I realized I had a stronger preference towards men.
To put it simply, I believe despite the both the heart, mind and body make up a whole, sexual orientation is determined by emotional attachment.
Which gender which you prefer to spend the rest of your life with? Wake up to the morning with?

[Han]

I would see myself as gay; i knew this since i was 10. *gosh, i'm blushing now. Anyway, i never had any relationship with neither guy nor girl. I mean, i would love to have someone special in my life; i want to feel warm and safe when i'm with that guy. But that never happen til now *sigh.
But somehow past few years i was attracted to girls. But it's not as strong as me being attracted to guys. ^.^

[neonemesis]

I grew up in a small city in France, at a time when Google was just a funny word. It was not so long time ago, but I was just not aware that a guy can love a guy. No TV Shows with gay character, no famous movie about homosexuality, no talks about that in the family. So like all my friends, I was dating girls and I even had strong feelings for one. I was 13 years old when something strange arrived. I realized it while looking at a perfume advertisement on a bus shelter: the half naked guy was, for me, much more sexy than the girl in bikini. Then it has taken me years to accept me the way I am. The first and most difficult "coming out" you have to do, is the one to yourself.

First I don't think we are gay, bi, straight or anything that can labeled us. Labeling has always been a convenient way for the brain not to be overwhelmed with information, but it is far from reflecting all the panels of people. Between the guy loving soft and fragile girls and the one loving macho men, there is an infinite number of possibilities.
Then you have to find your own path. Don't be afraid to try, don't be afraid also to stop when you don't feel comfortable anymore. Don't push yourself, don't rush yourself but please, don't close doors to your mind. Curiosity is what brought us where we are. From the time when we asked ourselves how fire was burning and why the stars were shining to the time when we are wondering the meaning of life and the purpose of love. Be curious but never be ashamed. Find the right person, then close your eyes, open your heart and you will feel the beauty of love.

Because love knows no gender and no border.

[Stephen]

High school year 8 had the hots for this guy lol. sighz never had a relationship b4 though. Being gay is weird at times, i feel like, at times i think that it would be so weird and wrong for me to like a girl!! (so messed up =P) I like guys sexually but yeah, to be honest, i hardly talk to guys cause i feel awkward around them especially if they are good looking. Definitely feel more at easy with a girl. I guess, you should give it a try though, i mean life's short so might as well give everything a try (without hurting anyone of course) =)

[Lion]

I went thru that stage too...
When i was in elementary i got many chicks, I lost my virginity to my first girlfriend...but when i got to high school i joined basketball club and then i met a boy in the gymnastics class. I thought it was normal at forst to keep seeing him, then i strated to crave for him. then sudennly i am under denial i thought of myself as being mentally sick at first...but then i just went with the groove and end up with my first boyfriend....(andy) we didnt last long but hey it was an experience that makes me think im comfortable with same sex relationship